I hadn’t seen him in a long time and now here I was on a train calling and telling him I was going to be in town and would he like a drink? We had been friends since Eton. He was not the first Etonian to do time and the way I was heading he wouldn’t be the last. …always been a bit messy, though. He preferred salsa to merengue, was allergic to strawberries and complained about being whipped. A lot. We met at the Criterion. Took me five mojitos to pluck up the courage, pull out the box and show him the ring – still on Ann’s finger. Leaving Eton, he warned me that Ann would give me a finger if asked to fund our project. Seeing his prophecy fulfilled literally, he gasped. Taking the box from me, he peered at the ring in hesitation. I gave him a curt smile. ‘The diamond is flawless,’ I said. ‘Waitress?’ he called. A spritzy lady arrived, hands behind her back. ‘I’ll take him to go,’ he said. She snapped a handcuff on my wrist.